Emotional overload

Paralysis

I am paralyzed by the emotional overload which this movie has given me. It ‘pings’ so many ‘ports’ of my conscience, so very effectively and deeply. And this song is the representative of the whole package. It goes like this,

Main kabhee batlata nahi, par andhere se darta hoon main maa,

Yoon to main dikhlata nahi, teri parwaah karta hoon main maa,

Tujhe sab hai pata hai na maa, Tujhe sab hai pata meri maa.

(English literal translation :

I never tell you this, but I am scared of the darkness, oh mother,

Generally I don’t show it, but I care for you, oh mother,

Do you know it all, oh mother? You know it all, oh my mother. )

Thoughts
I was thinking how emotions can paralyze a person, both mentally and physically. The first symptoms of this can be seen in the eyes, where you can’t control your muscles to stop the salty fluid from flowing out of the tear bags.

A greater impact can be seen mentally, when all day you just keep swinging here and there, and are not able to concentrate on your work, or do something else except being in that pathetic mental state.

If emotions are so harmful, then why do we need them anyway? If through evolution, only the best traits of all living beings get boosted and the useless ones get deprecated, how have we, humans, supposedly the most developed species on earth, retained this ‘defect’?

What good do emotions do to us that their shortcomings can be ignored as minor round-off errors? When a person is acting emotionally, it is less likely that he/she is doing things practically or rationally.

But if we look deeper, emotions can create revolutions, emotions can boost the morale of an entire army by a thousand times in magnitude, emotions can help people keep going on even when its gets tough, emotions can make someone achieve that practically and rationally seems impossible.

Conclusion

Emotions are a reason for misery and sadness in the world,

Emotions are behind revolutions, discoveries and inventions,

Emotions make us behave worse than animals sometimes,

Emotions are what makes us human.

Aag

‘Ramu ki aag’ …. bujh gayi

“Humko bhi AAG ne mara, tumko bhi AAG ne mara,  is AAG ko band karwaado.”
When we try to make tea at home, though its not a very big or significant task, still we take care to put the water first, then the tea leaves, then sugar, then milk and then pour it in cups and serve it while its hot. And yeah, kind of measure each thing before using it. The total cost of making a cup of tea doesn’t exceed like Rs. 20, thats also an exaggerated estimate. Ramu (aka Ram Gopal Varma) made a remake of Sholay. Assuming it costs at least a million times more than a cup of tea, couldn’t he have thought about the whole thing at least ten times more cautiously? At least should have seen how the songs begin in the movie. The scene is going on, and suddenly you see Devagan jumping around Ms. Kothari and woah, did a song just begin out of the blue?

And that new Thakur, even I can rate myself better in dialogue delivery. Comedy sucks, picturization, flow, connectivity.. and so on. There are a few good scenes worth appreciating, like the one when Thakur gets his palm cut, the climax scene, the jay-veeru-ko-gabbar-ke-hawale-kar-do scene. One more thing Ramu could have possibly done was thinking of changing something in the script. Like the new Don movie. That small punch at the end could have made the movie better.

Anyways, still WE SURVIVED IT through and through, lol.

Hey babyy

Nice movie. Good light comedy. Strong impacting emotion. Bearable storyline for a fun based movie. Good picturization. One item number. What else do we need to make an evening with friends lively and happening? Yesterday, we all got this DVD of Hey Babyy and saw it at home. And then a round of BC till 3:30 am. Oh god, I was so sleepy in the morning, got up at 8:30 and reached office only by 10:30, thanks to the great traffic of our new city.

Tanu is a little ill, and I am very very worried for her. Hope she gets better soon. Please pray for her.

I am still sitting in office, working a bit. Though a bit distracted too. Have a nice day. Ciao.

Another combo post :D

Its not fair. I write so less these days and most of the posts are just a sum total of the past days. Anyways, what can I do, lets continue the trend.

Tomorrow

Tomorrow is a busy day. I have to prepare a BTP presentation, a Advanced Graphics course presentation along with normal classes (read it as one class at 11). The upcoming matches from 7th of this month is to be recorded match-by-match on the tv.iiit.ac.in server. Yes!! The same old server which people enjoyed. We are working on the audio-video sync of the recording system these days. Hopefully after the series, the server will be open for the public.

This week

Well, I’ve to finish a lot of things this week. There is a pile of backlog for the Cognitive science course and a pending GPU assignment. We’ve set up a YUM REPOSITORY SERVER for IIIT. But mirroring 12 repositories for 6 platforms is a wastage of disk space and bandwidth. As a result, we are working on a better mechanism to create the repository. Sagar and I are jointly working on the project to come up with something good. Lets see what do we make.

This month

Diwali is ’scheduled’ this month. And its been 3 long months since I went home. I came to college on 7th of July 2006 and today is 4th of October 2006. I’m thinking to go home from 16th to 22nd of this month. As a result I’ve to skip a few classes and also finish the BTP final report beforehand, which is to be submitted on 24th of this month. Hopefully Jawahar sir will allow me to go home. I have to restart the work on the 4th semester 4 credit Mobile Blogging software project. The placements have come very near, and I need to have a clean marksheet.

Qt 4

Wow! This new thing is such a marvel. Initially I used to hate it, because I didn’t understand how to use it. But now I am familiar with the Ui namespace, resource files and other fundas, it feels good. For starters, let me tell you a good news. In Qt 3, if we created a Ui from Qt designer, and edited the header and sources generated using the uic command, the ui files used to overwrite them next time we needed to change something in Ui. Now, they’ve separated Ui component from the functionality code. As a result, the programmer can completely rely for Ui on Qt4 designer and on his code for the rest of it. Another good thing is resources. Now we can define the resources like images, text files used by the application we develop. All of them will get embedded inside the executable itself. As a result, we need to ship only single files instead of zip archives.

My experiments - Embedder

I was thinking about making something like ’setup.exe’ of windows. Generally linux setups come as tar archives or like rpm files. Almost nothing (except jdk setups, etc) come like a single setup file which handles everything. I wrote a command line utility as the first steps to generate something similar for linux. The command is called ‘createArchive’. This command takes two arguments, name of a new executable and a resource file. The resource file contains a list of files, both executable and ordinary. The command reads all files given in the resource file and finally creates an executable by the name as specified. This new executable contains all the files embedded in itself. Upon execution, this executable creates a temporary directory in /tmp and extracts all the files. It then executes the executables in a specified order. It has options of ‘quiet’ and ‘destroy extracted files on exit’ too. You can try this too. Download the files from here. It works on Linux, but is pretty much platform independent, most of if is just CORE C++. Maybe you can try it on windows as well. Does “FILE * fp;” work on windows? Sorry, the code isn’t documented (at all).

Movies

Ok, not many in the list. Lage Raho Munnabhai has been the favorite since a few days. I don’t know if the director had any intention to spread the gandhigiri, but I can see it already spreading (at least in orkut profiles). What I think one should notice is that the ‘noble thought’ is being internalized and understood by someone who has been violent and aggressive all the time, a gunda. If such a person can understand the words of truth and non-violence, we, the ordinary people ought to.

Pyaar ke side effects… they are already there. Actually Tanu wanted me to see this one. And after people appreciated it, I got desperate to see it. Eh, well I can already notice some of the side effects in my life too, hehe. In all a fun movie, a must see for your PC and can be worthy for the cinema hall as well.

Blogging - bring me back

Oh its been so long since I last visited my blog or someone elses. I am like out of the blogging world. Not that I am busy or something, but I do other things more often. They include movies, orkutting, chatting, working on the YUM REPO, etc. And rest of the time I am outside my room doing some other activities. Lets see if I revert back with this opening post. Actually I was considering of creating a private blog as well, or making this one private or something similar. I think a lot of my thoughts don’t find place in this open blog. Maybe its too early to let my ideas open for the public to read and judge.

Conclusion

Ok fine, now that I wrote a post, I have to have a conclusion. There is nothing to conclude though. Welcome me back to the blogging world. Hopefully going home this diwali. And well keep your fingers crossed for the upcoming YUM REPOSITORY and TV.IIIT.AC.IN.

Ciao.

Translating ‘Rang De Basanti’ song in English.

Someone anonymous requested that I translate the song, Rang de basanti. I am not too good at Hindi or Punjabi, but still I want to give it a try. Please don’t laugh if I go wrong. And if you can correct me, please do.

thodisi dhuul meri dharti ki mere watan ki
A little bit of soil of earth of my country,
thodisi Khushbuu baurai se mast pavan ki
A little bit of scent of the mad winds,
thodisi dhondhane waali dhak-dhak dhak-dhak dhak-dhak saansein
{dunno the meaning of dhondhane wali, maybe it means fast}
A little bit of lively and fast breaths,
jin mein ho junoon junoon voh boonde laal lahuu ki
Those red drops of blood, which have passion in them,
yeh sab tuu mila mila le phir rang tuu khila khila le - 2
You mix all of them, and create a new color,
aur mohe tuu rang de basanti yaara
And friend, you color me saffron,
mohe tuu rang de basanti
mohe mohe tuu rang de basanti - 9
oh mohe rang de basanti basanti rang de basanti - 2
Color me saffron .. {repeated many times}

sapnen rang de, apne rang de
Color my dreams, color my beloved,
khushiyaan rang de, gam bhi rang de
Color the happiness, and the sadness too,
naslen rang de, faslein rang de
Color all species, color all crops,
rang de dhadkan, rang de sargam
Color the heart beats, color the notes,
aur mohe tuu rang de basanti yaara
And friend, you color me saffron,
{after this, repeated from the first stanza}

dheemi aanch pe tuu zara ishq chadha
On a mild flame, put some love (to cook)
thode jharne laa, thodi nadi mila
Bring some waterfalls, mix some rivers,
thode saagar aa, thodi gaagar laa
Come here some oceans, bring some (water) pots,
thoda chhidak chhidak, thoda hila hila
Sprinkle a little, and then shake it,
phir ek rang tu khila khila
And then create ONE color,
mohe mohe tuu rang de basanti yaara
And friend, you color me saffron,
mohe tuu rang de basanti
Color me in saffron (color).

basti rang de, hasti rang de
Color the inhabitation, color the existance,
hans hans rang de, nas nas rang de
Color in jubiliation, color each vein (or artery, ;))
bachpan rang de, joban rang de
Color the childhood, color the joban {don’t know what joban means}
ab der na kar sachmuch rang de
Don’t delay it anymore, color me in reality,
rang rez mere sab kuchh rang de
O painter, color everything,
mohe mohe tuu rang de basanti yaara
And friend, you color me saffron,
{continued from the first stanza again}

I hope I was able to do justice with the translation, but this is only a word by word literal translation, don’t know the ‘deeper’ meaning. Try to figure it out. Cheers!

Rang De Basanti

Nothing much to say.. rest is said by this song..

ding ding ding ding ding ding ding
ding ding ding ding ding
thodisi dhuul meri dharti ki mere watan ki - 2
thodisi Khushbuu baurai se mast pavan ki
thodisi dhondhane waali dhak-dhak dhak-dhak dhak-dhak saansein
jin mein ho junoon junoon voh boonde laal lahuu ki
yeh sab tuu mila mila le phir rang tuu khila khila le - 2
aur mohe tuu rang de basanti yaara
mohe tuu rang de basanti
mohe mohe tuu rang de basanti - 9
oh mohe rang de basanti basanti rang de basanti - 2
(ding ding ding ding ding ding ding
ding ding ding ding ding) - 2

sapnen rang de, apne rang de
khushiyaan rang de, gam bhi rang de
naslen rang de, faslein rang de
rang de dhadkan, rang de sargam
aur mohe tuu rang de basanti yaara
mohe tuu rang de basanti
thodisi dhuul meri dharti ki mere watan ki - 2
thodisi Khushbuu baurai se mast pavan ki
thodisi dhondhane waali dhak-dhak dhak-dhak dhak-dhak saansein
jin mein ho junoon junoon voh boonde laal lahuu ki
yeh sab tuu mila mila le phir rang tuu khila khila le - 2
aur mohe tuu rang de basanti yaara
mohe tuu rang de basanti

dheemi aanch pe tuu zara ishq chadha
thode jharne laa, thodi nadi mila
thode saagar aa, thodi gaagar laa
thoda chhidak chhidak, thoda hila hila
phir ek rang tu khila khila
mohe mohe tuu rang de basanti yaara
mohe tuu rang de basanti

basti rang de, hasti rang de
hans hans rang de, nas nas rang de
bachpan rang de, joban rang de
ab der na kar sachmuch rang de
rang rez mere sab kuchh rang de
mohe mohe tuu rang de basanti yaara
mohe tuu rang de basanti
thodisi dhuul meri dharti ki mere vatan ki - 2
thodisi KHushbuu baurai se mast pavan ki
thodisi dhondne waali dhak-dhak dhak-dhak dhak-dhak saansein
jin mein ho junoon junoon voh boonde laal lahuu ki
yeh sab tuu mila mila le phir rang tuu khila khila le - 2
mohe mohe tuu rang de basanti yaara
mohe mohe tuu rang de basanti - 9
mohe rang de basanti basanti rang de basanti - 4
rang de rang de rang de basanti
(ding ding ding ding ding ding ding
ding ding ding ding ding) - 3
mohe rang de basanti basanti rang de basanti basanti
mohe rang de basanti rang de basanti rang de basanti yaara

How important is visual information in relation to friendship?

I really warn people that I can be rude anytime I want. And they have to be ready for it. Generally, I am calm and sweet to people. But at some rare occassions, I just over-do it. I am really really rude, I just don’t care what the other person might feel. But most of the time I do such a thing, I have a really concrete reason to do so. Why am I writing all this? Just a piece of information about me, hehe.

The days are passing as if I am not aware of them. I mean, I hardly remember whats the date today, and my mind has forgotten a time-map which was there. There is really no goal, no hope, its a state of utter confusion. I am confused whether I want to do GRE or MS from IIIT or a job. I need to decide this in a few months now. Lets see what happens.

Tanu has the NID exam a few hours from now. Hope she clears it. When she was talking, she was like, what the hell, let me take a break from padhai.. talk something else na. By the way, I keep telling her that one exam, one institute is not the end of the world. There is a lot still left to do.

My BTP is going on fine. I mean, there is very little activity, but still there is a somewhat defined path. I am being a little lazy too though. This mid sem exam I have very few papers. I have a Vision paper, and I am not sure whether there is a SE paper or not. So this means I have at max two papers.

We sent a gift to Riya, Tanu and me that is. She called me up to thank for it. I am kind of allergic to taking gifts. I mean, when you get a gift, you have to protect it, and keep it safe, still in front of you and all. Yes, it does make you happy, but its so much responsibility too. Especially if I am talking about me, whos room is a world war in itself, hehe.

We saw Kingkong the other day. Its a nice movie. Really good and real looking animation, nice sound effects, nice story, and a good senti ending. I know a lot of people will get bored of the part before the interval, but then nothing is perfect. This time the movie idea was of Bhanu. Thanks for that.

——-

I was thinking about how important is visual information? In todays world, most of us “chat” with people over the internet. Till date, most of it has been through TEXT. Some of us then start exchanging phone numbers and pictures. You have to certainly agree that AUDIO is a step ahead than TEXT, because it is more expressive.

Pictures on the other hand (not live ones) just show the other person how does the person on the other end look. How important is that? People say that looks are temporary, why bother? But here, I am not talking about LOOKS. I am talking about appearance, whether or not the other person is photogenic is a different issue.

Generally, when we make friends in person, the first thing we do is SEE him. While the natural process of friendship begins with SEEING, friendships on the internet generally get this facility months or years after it. Yeah, meeting the other person is the best that could happen, but my point is, by seeing the pictures, the other person can still create an image in the mind. Its really difficult to keep on talking to a person whos appearance you can just imagine.

Yeah, there are issues like people can morph the images and spread over the internet and all. But then, we’re talking about FRIENDS, and not about some random person. Sometimes its difficult to scan and send images, atleast loads of them. Is it a sin to demand a picture of your friend, while the people who sit with him can take 15 images per second with their eyes? What wrong have the friends sitting so far away done to receive such treatment?

Meri bheegi bheegi see…
palko pe reh gaye…
jaise mere sapne bikharke…
jale man tera bhee kisi ke milan ko…
anamika too bhee tarse…

Nice song and such nice lyrics. For the time being, this one is my favorite.

Yesterday night was cold and dark. I didn’t eat anything all day, so I had to go out. In the hurry, I forgot wearing a sweater, and went there in a half-sleeves shirt. When we returned, I was frozen. Ashish said, “Yeh to ekdam chilled ho gaya hai” and I said “To serve kar do na”. Anyways, after all that I was talking to friends on yahoo. Jaan (err… I mean Himanshu) came to my room at 2:30 AM. We decided to get up in the morning to exercise, but he was almost negative. I couldn’t get up before Tanu called up. I missed the class anyway.

Today I have to begin work on my project. Lets see what Tarun has to say. Have a nice day!

Right here, right now!

Right here, right now.. hai khushi ka samaa…
Right here, right now.. hum hain is pal jahan…
Bhool jao .. muskurao…
Reh na jaye baat baaki…

Nice song! Nice lively thought.

Living in the present, how correct is it? Whining or boasting of the past, how wrong is it? India was a slave in the hands of the British. India was called Sone ki chidiya in the past. Two statements which explain exactly what I am talking about.

As we grow up, we gain some sense of being us, some conciousness. We understand the past, live in the present, and plan the future. I don’t know when that sense came to me, maybe when I was 13 or a little older. Almost every human being, who is grown up enough has this kind of sense. But…

We come across so many people who are not actually in senses. One of the examples could be some bollywood star. Yes, a bollywood star. A bollywood star has almost completely forgotten that he is a human being. He is getting older day by day. He is on this planet to live. And that short stay is too short to waste it in being busy 24×7. He has stopped living like a human. He is just into making money and getting famous. Someone might say, an actor loves acting. He is actually doing what he wants to. There is where I want to say,
Ati ka bhala na bolna, ati ki bhali na choop,
Ati ka bhala na barasna, ati ki bhali na dhoop.
Which means, excess of anything is bad. Its not good to speak in excess, and nor is it good to keep shut. It is not good that it rains too much, nor is it good that there is too much sunlight.

Anyways, coming back to the point, most people have forgotten that they are human beings, their life is finite, and this life is the only chance they have. Most people just waste it in stupid things, or running after money and fame.

There are these others who are a class apart. They are not after anything, but they want to be cool. They want people to admire their coolness, their style. Most of them indulge in smoking, drinking, doping, etc. They flirt a lot, and generally don’t behave in their own natural way. They talk to girls in an unusual way, always trying to get the girl’s attention, and trying to ‘use’ her.

In my view, though I may be wrong, its not right to do it. First, be yourself. Accept the way you are. Once you accept yourself, people will accept you too. Behave in a consistant manner with everyone. Don’t change behavior because you want some favor from someone. Okay fine, you’d say, what about talking to your friend and talking to the professor? I’d say, its really a good practice if you avoid filthy language even with friends.

Most people tend to get close to people and remove the respect part from the relation. For example, a lot of third year people now talk to the fourth years as too tera and all (actually English doesn’t have those words). Yes, its good to get close, friendly. You both can become friends, do masti and whatever. But if someone is elder to you, whats wrong if you continue using aap? Getting friendly doesn’t mean getting ruder, more impolite or respect less. These two concepts are generally mixed up.

Conclusion: Look at the past, live in the present and plan the future. Always remember who you are and try to remain that. Be polite to everyone, get close to people but don’t drop the respect.

—

Anyways, I am fine today. Nice bright sunlight. Yesterday I was working on the PR project. Thank god, its been postponed to 16th. Hopefully I will do it by then. I took a DS&A tutorial class today, in the morning. The response was less, but I still managed to teach them some basics. I actually wanted to teach the other group too, as they are having problems in C++. Anyways, today most of the time I have to work on my PR project, and also talk to Jawahar sir regarding our BTP.

Good day!

Suddenly everything has turned me inside out…
Suddenly Love is the thing, that I can’t live without…

Nice song, soft, very-english, romantic, nice tune.

Anyways, here I am, 1:32 AM, sitting in my room, its cold, its lonely, and there is a hell lot of work! Fouzia is online though, she’s just investigating my heart, trying to ask me “Do I love someone?”. Well, I told her very precisely and clearly that I don’t love anyone, and I want to concentrate on my studies. She’s just trying to convince me, but am rigid, afterall, I know myself.

Anyways, finally, the CV test was held, even after repeatedly trying. Actually some of the MTech students had some PROBLEM. I don’t know why people behave so plastic, can’t they understand when someone says PLEASE. Some of the UG3 guys were not any less than those people. I got even more pissed when after the test, I didn’t get to play CS, because the server was full. Though it might look kiddish, but I am really pissed with the guy who didn’t restart the server for me, after something like 10 times of saying PLEASE.

Finally, I decided to do the normal thing, count till 10. I did it once, twice, thrice. It didn’t work. Then I called up Riya, and I don’t know when, it all slowly went away. She’s so nice to talk to, hehe. Oh, my balance is also over now, shit.

I have this PR project to work on. Its nothing actually, just one combination that will start working, but god! Its not working. I have tried and re-tried, and re-re-tried. Lets see if I can change the code, and do something else. Today is 11th, and I have to submit it on 13th. God, help me.

I am feeling quite sleepy now, and its about 2 AM. I have to get up at 6 AM to go to GRE class, and I am not able to decide whether to sleep or stay awake. Lets see.

Piece of advice: Don’t expect anything from anyone, they all turn you down.

Bheega bheega sa yeh December hai,
Yeh December ka sard paani hai,
Tez dhadkan hai, Garm saansein hain,
Bheegi bheegi see ik kahani hai,
Bheega bheega sa yeh December hai…

Nice song, I’ve been listening to this one repeatedly. The tune, the voice, the lyrics, wow! My favorite song of the week!

Anyways, Sumeet said, what the hell? You writing your daily time-table in your blog? Why? I mean, blog is to write some “interesting” things. Well, yeah, the day to day life is kind of boring. There are a lot of reasons. First, I want to keep a record. Second, its really nice to write everything down, its easier to sum up the entire day’s work/thoughts. Third, it makes my own ideas/thoughts/viewpoints/stands more firm and confident. When I write this blog, I analyze everything again. This way I know exactly what went wrong, was I wrong or the other person and what to do next! It might as well convey some message directly to some person. Last, but not the least, I am free!

Today, I didn’t do much. I got up quite late. We kind of sorted out the SE offline questions. A lot of them were asked for the sake of asking, especially people like Sarath Chandra. Anyways, lets hope we finish answering soon.

I have to execute whatever I said about the PR project too. I missed the Vision tutorial too. God knows what am I going to do. I’ll contact Nikhil and find out. Rest is I guess fine. Kubuntu 5.10 Breezy didn’t work. Have to redownload the ISO.

Piece of advice: Kulbir Saini’s Linux blog is worth reading.

Alvy came online today. Lami aka Baby aka Nopy has no cell these days. Busy in studies I guess. Let her study. Best of luck to her.

Chalo then, Ciao.